Cheaters Never Prosper
Posted by WhiteCoat on May 30, 2008
Sometimes it is easy to put one over on the system.
In fact, sometimes even if you don’t have a way to pay for your medical care you can get your care for free when you go to the ED. All you have to do is “forget” your ID, register under a false name, give a false address, and give a false phone number. You get your workup done and then the bills go to some vacant lot in the middle of nowhere and collection calls go to some fast food restaurant.
Even better, if you want to get back at someone, you can forget your ID, register under their name and use their address and phone number. You get your workup and they get the collection calls.
The only person I ever busted in the ED for doing this was a patient who came in with abdominal pain and who showed her friend’s public aid card. Worked out well until we discovered that she had an ectopic pregnancy and needed surgery. Suddenly her name wasn’t “Margarita” any more. Now she has a hospital bill and a police record.
This brilliant scheme just has one flaw:
If we find something wrong after you leave, we can’t contact you.
If your vaginal cultures come back with gonorrhea, you’ll just continue infecting all your baby daddys. If you’re unfortunate enough to have untreated syphilis, well … at least neurosyphilis takes a while to become symptomatic (hint: if your woo-hoo stops working and you start walking funny, either see a doctor for real or eat some moldy bread).
If your x-ray shows a broken bone that is initially misread as being “normal”, then we can’t let you know to come in for a cast. When you don’t heal right, have chronic pain, and try to sue the doctor and hospital, the jury probably won’t look too fondly upon a lying thief.
Most importantly, if you’re in a car crash, you whack your head, and the radiology resident misses a case of pneumocephalus, giving us the number to Domino’s Pizza won’t allow us to call you back to arrange for a neurosurgical evaluation. You may develop a brain infection and croak. Bummer.
But hey – as long as we have Domino’s on the phone, everyone in the ED says that those MeatZZa Feasts are just to die for.
idahokat said
Coming from the EMS side of things – I’ve actually had patient’s in the past where we picked them up their residence, yet at the ER they would give a different name and/or address, etc. Needless to say, they were caught each time. Few things surprise me anymore.
ERnursey said
Every day I spend countless wasted minutes trying to ‘call back’ patients who have given a bogus phone number and address – dumb asses
It defies my sense of logic why hospital admins don’t pay someone to sit there and verify the information while the patients are still in the hospital.
nandita said
I’m afraid this is completely unrelated to your post. I just read your disclaimer-cum-CR statement and was reminded of The Konomark Project which I came across a while ago. I thought it might interest you.
Katherine said
As a former personal injury paralegal, I know EXACTLY what you are talking about, doc. Even some of our clients pulled this stuff on us–and then would yell at me when I couldn’t contact them. (I mean, come on. Disconnected phone numbers, returned letters from non-existent addresses… HOW am I supposed to reach this sort of client?!?)
My favorite recollection was when my boss and I were prepping this one client for a deposition, and we asked him what his social security number was. He asked, “Which one?” Uhhh, what? Turned out, he had three SSNs… all fake. It only got better. We asked his address – par for the course – he gave us a completely different address than the one we had on file for him and the one we had submitted in the Interrogatories. And when we asked the scope of his injuries–w00t! Instead of having a broken arm and some lumbar-thoracic vertebrae broken, ALL OF A SUDDEN, his skull had been fractured, EMS had to pull him out with the jaws of life, and he was in a coma for months.
I knew right then that we were going to lose the case, because nothing the client said had happened, actually happened. It wasn’t in the medical records we had, it wasn’t in the medical analysis provided by our experts… it was a legal disaster waiting to happen.
I am so glad I quit that job. Too many clients of ours were like that!
Mickey said
Thats not true. if you are a good cheater you will prosper… but definitely it is not right to cheat.
I still believe in karma. Maybe you’ll prosper for a little while. Eventually it will catch up with you.
Tex said
You’re talking about regular patients just trying to bilk the system. Illegals aliens is a whole other issue. They all have the same SSN! LOL
Steve said
This statement could be taking in jest: Maybe their actions are just evolution working. I mean if the organism isn’t smart enough…doesn’t the environment “take ‘em out”?
Steve
Rob said
I’m a PA in orthopaedics and the sad thing here is that with malpractice rates sky rocketing a lying, decieving patient who doesn’t leave contacting information can still attempt to sue. Just bringing a case against a medical professional cause a great deal of undo stress. Practice medicine and try to take care of dishonest people, see where it can get you.
SeaSpray said
I have wondered about patients sometimes. We would get a lot of skiers/snow boarders that left their wallets back in the locker and I do think that is mostly true and friends would usually come in later with the wallet.
But sometimes…sometimes you just get this vibe, especially when they don’t know their SS# and certain info. Your right. We don’t refuse treatment and the work ups get done. But it will be their loss if there needs to be follow up.
I wonder how much that kind of fraud costs the medical system?
Del said
I can definitely see your point. But, there are two sides to every issue. As a recent college grad who just got socked with student loans with a job that doesn’t offer medical insurance until after six months of working, I can see why a person would “cheat.” After forking over a few grand for the security deposit of my new apartment, filling up my car with gas, and buying groceries I honestly don’t have any money to get health insurance on my own. Sometimes I wonder what I would do if I had a sudden health emergency.
Amy said
Del, I’m not trying to start anything here, but do you have cable tv? do you eat out for lunch or brown bag it? Buy a cup of coffee from Starbucks every day? Short term health insurance is made for people like you. Low premiums, high deductible, but there if you need it. And it doesn’t cost that much, especially for a healthy young guy/gal like yourself. Be responsible; make a small sacrifice for six months, and get some health insurance. You’re a grown up now.
Now, back to our regular programming.
Dedicated_Dad said
My Ex had a different twist on this.
She’d bring the kid to me (I had them every weekend), sick, but refuse to share her welfare “medical assistance” so I had to pay out of pocket. Tried to add them to my plan, but they wouldn’t do so because the kids had MA. Push Mom for the numbers, she’d refuse.
Then she figured out how to REALLY screw me. She’d take the kid to ER, deny any insurance (though she had the aforementioned welfare “medical assistance”) and tell them *I* was the “responsible party” but claim she didn’t know my address.
I (naturally) knew nothing about this until the collection-agents started calling. Since I had a job, and the court-order said “joint custody” they came after me even though I’d never signed anything. Pay up or further damage my credit rating.
Went to the “welfare” folks — they “couldn’t discuss it with me” much less give me the kids’ “MA” numbers. I volunteered to provide the insurance, they said “that takes a court order.” All told, including a couple of hospitalizations over the years this went on, I had to “eat” ~$20k that should have been covered by MA or my insurance.
There was also lots of evidence of her alleging serious problems that didn’t exist — “seizures” that didn’t happen which led to an 18 month old getting a lumbar puncture, for example. She claims 105 fever, nurse finds 99.8 — this one happened literally dozens of times.
When The Court finally awarded me sole custody they specifically banned her from taking either child to a Dr. or Hospital (during her visitation) for anything but a life-threatening emergency, in which case she was to call 911 first and me second/immediately thereafter. From then on, each time she called claiming one of them was sick, I brought them home and she lost her “visitation.” This at least put a stop to the sickness claims…
DD